I Feel Angst

I feel angst. You think it only affects a certain point of your life when you were young and you have a lot of questions about life but then again you wonder why you still get hit by it long after your teenage and young adult years when you thought you have learned a lot from the experiences you've come across both high nor dry.

Disappointing it is but angst is one truth one may still suffer from in all periods of life. First you think you are angsty because you are young and are still struggling to get a feet of your own, therefore you need to depend on others (family or not) to help you through school and eventually to work so the anger may be due to the feeling of helplessness.

Next you get past the helplessness but angst still catches up on you as if there is a race between you and it. Midlife comes and the anger boiling within your heart is for the disappointment that despite getting past the helplessness stage with you having a job, home, or maybe your own kids to raise you feel there is still something missing. There was the past that you cannot undo, with the thought that there should have been so much more to grab in life had you been wiser when you were younger.

Finally when at the peak of life when age makes you physically weaker to run, angst runs past you, you look back at all that you were never able to do and you realize that it is because you let anger eat your heart, your mind, your soul, your very being.

There is no such thing as being complete and it is not for men to be completely satisfied in life because in this fleeting world where all passes by like wind which blows but then is no longer; yet nonetheless, if there are things that you can actually hold and call your own in whatever stage of life, there is no point in letting it slip between your fingers because anger or anything gets a better hold of you. So although I feel angst, I'd move on. #
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