What to Do When Your Child Prefers the Nanny over You

It cannot be helped, especially if you are a working mother and you hire a nanny to help you attend to your child while you were busy at work, that your child prefers the nanny over you sometimes. Having a nanny for your child is convenient but it comes with a price.  There is always that situation where your kids, like any other child taken cared by their nannies, prefer the nanny over their mothers.  It is an uncomfortable situation and is hurting as well. What will you do in situations like this?

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from nanniesontheblock.ca
  1. Relax and take it easy. It is just a temporary thing.  It is only natural for a child to prefer someone whose attention were all unto him or her.  Hiring a nanny is not like getting a husband where it is a till death do you part affair.  Sooner or later, the nanny will leave your home and your child will definitely want your attention again.  Do not worry.  Instead, give the child your care when you have time like giving him or her a bath when it’s the nanny’s day off or read stories for him or her instead of attending to your bring home work (do it once your kid falls asleep).
  2. Vent your frustration somewhere else. It is not wise to either keep a grudge with the nanny or make the child pay for misplaced loyalty.  When the child is looking for the nanny, just remain calm and keep him calm.  Cry if you want to but not in front of the child. A call to a friend might not make you a millionaire but it will help settle things down. 
  3. Are you sure you are having problems with it? Many parents, specifically mothers find it annoying and uncomfortable when children let out a loud cry each time their mother leaves the house and go to work.  Now that they have their attention to someone else, isn’t it right to be grateful and be happy that you will not hear reports that your child cried the whole day looking for you?  Think about it.
  4. Leave your worries behind but not you. When this situation slowly unfolds right in front of your eyes, it is time to take matters into your own hands.  It simply means that you create new ways to bond with your child which does not involve the nanny.  For example, a simple walk around the neighbourhood before dinnertime might help reconnect you and your child. 
  5. You are the mother and not the nanny. Do not allow the nanny to decide for you. For example, if you arrive from work at 6 PM, tell her that bath time is at 7PM.  When this is broken, ask her to explain.  She should know the boundaries between you as the mother and her as your assistant.  Just like a secretary in the office, she must follow instructions unless you want to. She cannot be the boss. 
So, do not take it personally when your kids prefer their nannies.  It is not the end of the world.  You can always reconfigure bonding moments with your child to offset the attention given by the nanny. 

Published for Nannies on the Block
Website: http://www.nanniesontheblock.ca
Address: Monterey drive, Nanaimo BC v9t6r9

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